The Exile Files

Raging Against the Outrageous. Laughter and Insanity Abound.

Archive for January 12th, 2010

Wrapped Sausages

Posted by Exile on January 12, 2010

We’ve been having a real cold spell over here recently. Now that the global warming crowd have failed in Copenhagen to give us the predicted desert conditions that we expected, winter is upon us with a climatic vengeance.

I don’t normally take special consideration to the weather. It is what it is. I dress accordingly. Our dogs, can’t do this but as they are sporting the years winter coat that they normally do, I don’t worry too much about it. My wife, on the other hand, couldn’t stand the thought of the two dogs, who do sink into the snow, dragging each eight highly sensitive nipples over the icy surface. Dachshunds have remarkably short legs. The snow builds up as an ice sheet, clinging to the shorter hairs on those delicately pink bellies. That was simply unacceptable to the long haired and lovely one of us. I won’t go into detail here, but she has already tried knitting leg warmers for the dogs, but they couldn’t keep them on.

So then, it had to be. Coats for the dogs, complete with a belly binder to protect the tender bits. The dogs protested a bit at first. Getting into these things is not so easy as it appears to be. One starts by putting their heads into the appropriate holes, stretch the upper coat down the back and slip the back legs into the elasticated straps which holds the thing in place. The belly warmer goes between the front legs, stretches over the tummy and is then closed over the back of the dog at the hips.. if your dog has hips. Ours do, albeit slightly fat ones.

The dogs ran around in the house sporting these things and looked at each other in disbelief. How could we do this to them? Why?

That became apparent as we ventured out this morning. The dogs seemed to enjoy being a little warmer out there and not coming home with an icy panzer plated stomach. They still allowed themselves the luxury of laying down in front of the wood stove with two bellies up and eight legs skyward after the walk but I think they appreciate our protective efforts anyway.

Here they are. In all their fashionable glory.. And they call it a CATwalk..?


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